Single A Marketing Report – NBL Nellis

“Okay Race fans this past weekend was stop #4 of the NBL War of the Stars (what stars?) in Las Vegas, Nevada home of the death of 2pac. This weekend was a highly anticipated one with the Nellis group adding an additional $5000.00 to Elite men and the other $5000.00 to other meaningless pro classes like 420 SuperClass with no pull. For some reason Vet pro didnt see an extra dime but hey, its vet? Youre supposed to be racing for nothing. You should be retired from BMX with 3 cribs, a Mercedes-Benz in the driveway and a shoe box full of cash under the bed from all the cruiser contingency you blew out from a Nirvous Bike Company.”"Stale Holmes- Factory Freaks.com The bald savvy veteran did it again. Stale played it vet and was scene riding around the hotel recovering in full uniform Saturday night, just after getting 5th in the elite semi. It must of worked because on Sunday he turned it around and got into the super hard elite men main event with no pull. But Stales real win came in the form of Stale resisting temptation of strip clubs, brothels, and Desperate BMX Wives. Very Proud of ya. Stales blows out the budgets for: Factory Freaks Bicycles, Joakley recyclable sunglasses, ODI Rubbers, AXE Body Spray, HB Tanning, Kendal Jackson Tires, Club Magazine, KY Jelly and the local pizza Joint that Mike Gullible works for. Style Bennett-Factory Freaks Bicycles.com Style showed up shoeless or I mean clipless and forgot his Shimano Moon Walkers. Kyle had to ride in some soccer cleats come Saturday morning and got squirreled out manualing a little double and slammed into the face of the next jump. Style went home and that was it. Great. Style Bennett is still loved by: Factory Freaks Bicycles, Shimano Shoes when he doesnt forget them, Velodrome Seats, Chris Cringle Hubs, Abercrombie Jeans, ATI Rubbers, TruFubar Cranks and Mini Trucking Magazine. Mikey Payday-Baseball Stats/Redbull Mike is the man to watch on the track no doubt. Mikey turned it up a full 365 degrees on Saturday and scored the big elite win passing some dude that looked like he got shot out of a human cannon. Come Sunday, Mikey had blown his nut as well as the gate in the semi. Mikey still retains the points lead and we are very proud of him. Mikey is sponsored by: Baseball Stats, Redbull energy drinks, Flying Handlebars and gear, Joakley recyclable sunglasses, ODI Rubbers, and didnt forget his Shimano Moon Walkers. Bubba Stewart-KawasakiLine Bubba decided to race BMX this weekend and found out how hard it was on Saturday with a crash in the first round that would eventually get him motoed. Dont get us wrong in Pro Open (a class he rarely knows anything about) went to chase a Mosquito around the Nellis track and swatted the shit out of him. Good job. Bubba didnt show up on Sunday figuring BMX was like Supercross. He will be ready next weekend for stop 94 of the ABA Pro Series. Bubba is proudly cashing in on: Kawasaki, NoNeal helmets, Shimano Moon Walkers, Lizard Skins, Alligator Skins, Sheep Skin and Xtra Skin? G-Romeo & Juliet- Recovery Bicycles (nothing a month) Gs stiff style but mad pull got him into the Eliteless mains in Nellis. Greg scored two fabulous 8th place finishes. Buddy G couldnt recover from his lost titles in 97 and still battles with terrible gates when it counts. G still isnt mad at cha but he needs to get over it and move on into the Vet Class being he is 34 and got fake hair. G isnt sponsored and fronts with stickers: Recovery Bikes, Jamie Fox helmets and gear, Maxxless tires, Sun Pringle, S&M Neal Wood Headlock Grips, Supercuts, ODI Rubbers and ABA/GT Weed Busting Drug Tests. Mtv Stevenson- Baro Bicycles Podge took the time out from the Studio to do a little hip throwin bar bangin BMX racing. Welcome back. Podge looked good holeshotting on is sprained knee including the Elite Main! Podge took a 3rd and a 2nd in open after Mikey Payday passed him in the last turn. Podge will soon be on Mtv Cribs showcasing a bunch of cars, motorcycles and gay Rainbow jerseys. Podge is also working on his new Rap Album featuring guest artist like 50 Cent, G-unit, Game and Omarion to debut on TRL in the summer! Podge is sponsors that pick up the bill are: Haro Bicycles. Bell Hop Helmets, Shimano Moon walkers, FAA Regulated cranks and headsets, Ati Rubbers, Maxless tires, West Coast Customs, Prohoes.com Derek Betcher-Recovery Bicycles DB was in true fast form this weekend talking shit on how he beat every Eliteless pro in practice. Very proud of you DB! You get paid for practice? DB managed to stay away from the mirror of fixing his Paris Hilton haircut and waxed the Pull less 420class. On Sunday, DB was spitting game, trying to talk to ISTVs Kathy into going on a date with him, she replied Next! Because of this rejection, DBs feelings were hurt and couldnt focus for the 420main event. Chalk him down for an emotional 6th. DBs nothing a month sponsors are: Recovery Bikes, Jamie Fox helmets and gear, Answer, Shimano Disco Slippers, Pumer, ODI Rubbers, Diesel Jeans, MySpaceless.com, ProHoes.com, Mary Kay Cosmetics. Single A marketing doesnt represent these guys. We just get a 9% cut from nothing which still equates to nothing. In no way is this press release a disrespect (Libel and Slander lawsuit playoff). Oh and its a joke. Dont complain to BMX News.com you babies“